Friday, October 21, 2011

Friday Kahn Job: Oregon State Edition (CS)

Hello Cougar Nation and my legion of Brigadier Generals!

Hope you've had a fantastic week.

As for me, well, its been a crazy one. I mean, it was only last week where I felt like I was finally getting my mojo back with the WSUFB blog. And then, on Sunday morning, I woke up with Sutra hovering over my bed sobbing, "Its over, its over, its over."

But, before I could go completely ballistic on his pseudo-cosmic arse, he set me up with the whole "I've got some good news, bad news" trip.

And so, in response to all that blubbering of his, I said,

"So, apart from the fact that you have now completely ruined my purpose in life, Sutra, what could possibly be the good news?"

His reply: "You will no longer be kept in a cage."

My response (almost smiling): "And the bad news?"

"We're going to a place where we will be completely and utterly irrelevant."

Now, I don't know about you all, but those words were like music to my freaking ears!

After all, no one has better defined irrelevance in the blogosphere than me!   I mean, doesn't Sutra know that NO ONE has made a career out of making irrelevant more relevant than I have??

So, if you want to read my plans to continue to rule the world of prognostication--even from blog purgatory, then read on.

Nation, if you've been around the block as many times as I have, then you're already pretty versed in the intricacies of coach speak. And truly, if this is your first stroll around the coach speak neighborhood, this week provides a really good tutorial.

You see, when a coach is concerned about the team he is playing, his typical weekly press conference goes on and on and on about how special and/or spectacular members (or units) of the other team seem to be. So, with UCLA, it was all about their running game, their size, their athleticism blah, blah, blah. And then last week it was how great Stanford is at this, Stanford is at that, blah, blah, blah, blah. Of course, when we harken on back at Weeks 1 and 2, you heard a very different tune:

For instance, "Hey Coach, given that Idaho State has new personnel and a new coach, what can you expect to see out of that team this week?"

CPW: "We're going to have to make some in game adjustments. But more than that, we just have to play Cougar Football."

So enter OSU Beaver week--which is arguably the biggest week to date in the Paul Wulff era.

I mean, the guy's job is all but cooked if we lose this one! And because of what's at stake,

you would think that Wulff would be talking, and talking, and TALKING about the cannon arm of Sean Mannion..... ?

Or maybe the lightning speed of James Rogers......?

Or maybe the weaponry of Wheaton or the potency of the Beaver return game against our punting/kick-off unit.....?


Instead, Wulff has sung what should now be familiar refrain to all of us:

"We need to concentrate on ourselves, execute, and play Cougar Football."

Meaning: Oregon State is not very good and if we play the way we practice, we'll kick their beaver butts up and down the field.

So, for the first time in a long time, we can look at a conference game and say the following: IF we don't turn the ball over and if we don't give up the big play on special teams, we're going to win going away. And really, that's all there is to it.  

Cougs win handily 41-17.

 (A quick note on the Cougs before getting to the other games): Chester Sua, you are the man. In fact you were so good that I'd REALLY like to see the Hair Man slide to the inside with Mizell so we can play a 3-4 with Hoffman-Elllis and Sua on the outside. I'd also like to see us more in the 3-3-5 since Locker looks to me to be playing the best safety on the team this week. Plus, as I noted last week on the Mothership, that type of scheme portends to play really well against Oregon and Cal over the next two weeks...and our 4-3? Not so much.... Logwone Mitz. How about playing the entire game the way you played on the second to last offensive play of the Stanford game? I mean, one minute you're doing the Frank Madu "Watch me fall onto the couch" routine, and the next you're like Brandon Jacobs of the NY Giants.

How about mixing in a bit more of that, champ?  We need you Mitzy!

Crap-12 Picks  

UCLA 35 Arizona 31. Normally, when you have a sleeping giant (UCLA) who's not very good, you want their coach to stay. But in this case, we used to beat UCLA when they were good, and we can't beat their current coach even when they suck..

So what the hell do we care if they aren't very good?

And here's the other deal: When you're good, you want all the teams with the potential to have winning records to win, so your strength of schedule looks better to the National pollsters.

But, when you're not very good, you want every team that could be marginal to lose so you can go to a good bowl if you become eligible. I mean look at last year, the Huskies were 6-6 but still went to the stinking Holiday Bowl because we had 2 BCS teams in conference and everyone else was TERRIBLE. So, with that in mind, I say "Lose, Ricky Lose!!"

Unfortunately, Rick seems to win every time I say that. (By the way, I'm writing this post about 1.5 hours before game time. You'll have to trust me on that)  

Touchdown Jesus 38 USC 17. Kelly=Good Coach. Kiffin=Not so Good Coach. Moreover, count me in as a guy that REALLY WANTS SC to stay down because I think it really helps to the Cougs. And a 9-3 Window dressing year could really give Kiffin a few more years to destroy that program. Unfortunately, methinks that ND's pass offense is going to SHREAD the Trojans to pieces, especially in South Bend.  

Utah 27 CAL 13. Utah's D-Line is still respectable and CAL's O is in a funk that they may not get out of......until they play us. Seriously, Utah's upside is something that we don't need to worry about, while I'm hoping (and thinking) that the Utes keep CAL on their downside.

Stanford 38 UW 27. This game has the makings of a GREAT game. In the end, while I think that UW's offense is that of a legit top 15 team (which puts them in the category of being able to beat almost anyone on any given Saturday), their D simply is not there. And while I think that the running game of Polk is going to make this interesting through 3 quarters, I also think that the diversity of Stanford's defensive scheme is going to force Price into some TO's.

Mind you, if I'm a UW fan, I'd be really psyched about this game. But most all, I'd just want my quarterback to leave the game unscathed. We'll see.

Alright, that's the end of the first week of the Cougalicious blog.   (insert humping crickets photo)

Sutra will be back Monday with some thoughts about the Beaver game. And lets hope they're happy thoughts!

All for now. Go Cougs...


The Coug-A-Sutra said...

U-C-L-A. Need I say more??

Sean Hawkins said...

Great call on the Bruins. Yeesh. The Weasel takes a huge step towards the unemployment line and the Mildcats show some fight now that they got rid of the evil STOOPID.

Cougla Kahn said...

Hah! Now that I'm free from the cage, you're on my list, Hawkins. You're on my list.

Like me said, while it doesn't do us any wonders for our morale, having UCLA lose DOES help us if we become bowl eligible.

Also, usually teams that should have been good catch fire RIGHT BEFORE they play us.

Now, its AZ potentially catching fire right before they play the U.

Could there be a turn in cosmic mojo? Sutra?

TruCoug89 said...

On this one, I definitely trust that you wrote before the UCLA game.

Do you think it was UCLA giving up on Ricky Boy, or was UA a sleeping giant unleashed after getting a chemically balanced, mentally-stable coach?

Furthermore, how do you resolve the dissonance between UCLA beating OSU handily in Corvallis, UA losing to OSU in Corvallis, then UA turning around and absolutely steamrolling UCLA?

The Coug-A-Sutra said...

Sorry I missed this, but was out of town traveling all weekend. Crazy.

In regards to UCLA, I think its a mix between being pretty banged up, not buying into the coaching, and UA playing close to their potential.

In fact, I'm pretty interested to see the UA-UW game this week.

With respect to the also rans, the transitive property rarely carries for college sports. As long as there is reasonable talent on each team, the bottom feeders tend to trounce each other all the time. The reason: Bad/Poor teams are much more volatile when it comes to mental preparation. And so, just like we came out on Saturday thinking the game was won, so did UCLA against a near winless Zona team that lost their coach.

And truly, in football, when you come out flat, its REALLY hard to flip that switch. We see that when west coast NFL teams play early games on the East Coast: They get drubbed.